The Stuff: Are You Eating It... Or Is It Eating You?

Plot: Two miners find a strange while milky substance oozing out from the ground. They proceed to taste it (as you do) and find it strangely delicious, addictively so even. Fast forward a few months and the "Stuff"'s craze/crave is sweeping across the USA, being sold as a delicious desert. But the Stuff might not be all that it seems, and its true nature has got an icky surprise in store for those addicted to it. And you thought Coke Zero was bad.

The Stuff belongs to an 80's sub genre, the substance horror, just like the Blob, Street Trash and more loosely Brain Damage, a trend which saw sub David Cronenberg directors experiment with the human body as if it was some bright playdo.

Asia Argento/Jodorowsky: The Madness

After Jennifer Lynch and Brendan Cronenberg, it is the turn of yet another child of one of cinema's tzar of the bizarre to follow their infamous fathers' footsteps, Adan Jodorowsky. I truly hope Peter Greenaway's children are taking note as we speak. Anyhow, out of nowhere came this teaser for Adan Jodorowsky's film called The Voice Thief, which looks absolutely fantastic!

At first, I got excited, what a brilliant trailer, I thought, I cannot wait for the full film! Then I realised it might be a fake trailer, cruelly destined never to be seen, a bit like Thanksgiving or Fu Manchu with Nicolas Cage in Grindhouse, which never got the transition to full feature length they deserved (at least we got Machette!). The reality lies half way through. While The Voice Thief is a real film indeed, this teaser is meant as a crowd funding tool to help the director realise a short film out of this.

Wreck it Ralph – A Blast Of Creativity

A 3D computer animated film from former American director of The Simpsons and Futurama, Rich Moore, for in-house Walt Disney Animation Studios (who recently released the fabulous Bolt and Tangled) couldn’t be a disappointment.

Bullet To The Head Review

With a title such as Bullet to the Head staring a Sylvester Stallone with what looks like impressively low body fat of around 12% and directed by 48 Hrs (1982) and Red Heat (1988) Walter Hill, the story of this film was never likely to be overly complicated. 

Bullhead Review

As Al Pacino's Tony Montana from Scarface plainly illustrates, indulging in one's own contraband is not necessarily the best choice in business.  Nominated for an Oscar in the Best Foreign Film category in 2012, writer and director Michael R. Roskam's Bullhead focuses on another type of drug business, that of the Belgian bovine hormone mafia. The usual parties of the human drug world are swopped in Bullhead for quiet dinners and cattle sheds. 

Dharma Guns: French Experimental Punk Cinema

In Dharma Guns, a man suffers a terrible jet-ski accident. Waking up partly amnesiac, he goes after a mysterious pharmatical corporation in the strange island country of Los Estrellas, which manufactures a medication he has become reliant on, which seems to turns its subjects into zombies in too high dosage!

The FilmLand Awards 2013

The BAFTA awards, a glacial snooze fest where American stars pretend to care. Golden Globes who once gave an acting award to Pia Zadora. The Oscars who picked Crash over Brokeback Mountain. Now that we have established that film awards are worthless, time for the real deal, the FilmLand Awards 2013.